When parents stop being polite and start getting real

It goes without saying that plasticmom is just the best. She's endearing, very sweet, hilarious and incredibly nice. You know how older people sometimes speak their mind and stop caring so much about being polite or saying the right thing? I think plasticmom might be tipping into that and I'm going to start finding out what she really thinks. It's gonna be good!

Scene: plasticann is sorting through old photographs

plasticann: [looking at a high school photo] I think I'm going to have to shred this one.

plasticmom: No no, let me see it first.

plasticann: [holds photo for plasticmom to see] What do you think?

plasticmom: [Wincing with a look of mild horror grabs the photo] AGHHHHHH! The pimples, the braces, the hair, ughhhhhh! Is that really you? Maybe you should shred it.

plasticann: [laughing] MOM, that's the wrong thing to say. Here's another one from high school. You ready?

plastimom: [bracing herself] That's not you? That's your friend. 

plasticann: That's me!

plasticmom: I don't believe it. That's not you. Why is this shirt so loose, what's this weird dress?

plasticann: That's my shirt and my dress. I remember buying it and I really liked it.

plasticmom: I still don't believe it.

Key takeaways:

• plastimom is horrified by my class photo, the one day I made some sort of effort regarding my appearance. I'm with her, I too feel mortified in retrospect. Fortunately, I was blissfully unaware during my "awkward years."
• plasticmom can't recognize me from a photo and still insists it's not me.
• plasticmom was gracious enough or blind enough to think I was "adorable"during these awkward years, but she's clearly mildly horrified looking back. Ignorance is bliss.
• plasticmom continues to make me laugh so hard my sides hurt.