plasticmom makes everything better

This is kinda gross, but I was chatting with plasticmom last night about how my face got super dry and flaky this week.

plasticann: My face is all dry and itchy...it got really bad overnight and it looks really bad.
plasticmom: Oh no...flaky dry skin...itchy...you should see a doctor...are you ok...wait, you're getting married in June...you need to take care of this.
plasticann: Hopefully it'll clear up by June. I'm trying Vaseline because I'm really desperately dry and itchy. I put it on my cheeks and chin.
plasticmom: Wait...where are you dry?
plasticann: My cheeks and my chin.
plasticmom: So you're not severely dry all over your face? That's just wind burn and dryness from winter...little babies get that all the time, just their cheeks get really dry. You'll be fine.
plasticann: [wondering if she had translated cheek incorrectly in Taiwanese] Did I say "cheek" and "chin?" Are you sure it'll be OK? Will it get better?
plasticmom: Don't worry...it's just dry skin from the cold. You're fine.

I finally tried Vaseline petroleum jelly mainly because I was desperate and itchy last night. It's like magical elixir, it's working and I'm no longer scaly and nasty. Vaseline...who knew! I'm going to try it on my cracked hands. Somehow when plasticmom tells me I'll be fine, it feels infinitely more comforting. I'm glad I don't have leprosy!