"THIS JUST IN:" Those who are "pococurante" to hardware or go by the monikers "MGDub" & "GJDubya" may find some of the following content to be less than enthralling. Then again, I could be wrong.
If you happen to find yourself with some free time in NYC this year, I highly recommend the Cooper-Hewitt Museum's "National Design Triennial: Inside Design Now" exhibit. They've culled the most innovative designs over the past few years in fashion, architecture, product design and technology for this exhibition. I should note, I stopped counting how many different projects originated from MIT's Media Lab, "too many I tell you." I, of course, loved it, but I already knew that. Adam enjoyed himself as well despite being hesitant initially. I bought the book if anyone's interested.
The Copper-Hewitt was my favorite museum visit also because I found a complimentary museum guide in the gift shop that included a coupon for free admission to The Museum of Television & Radio. NICE! There's nothing to see at this museum, you just watch TV. Adam and I watched Jerry Seinfeld's first HBO special from 1987 in one of the screening rooms and then we went to the library where you can watch any TV episode in their database on your own TV console. I was super excited because I've always wanted to watch the Martha Stewart episodes where the Muppets guest star...they just sound hilarious. Unfortunately, the museum didn't have any Martha Stewart episodes, so I settled for a Columbo movie, the 1971 premiere...gotta love Peter Falk.
Friday, May 30, 2003
The Bumpkins
Adam and I journeyed to NYC last weekend for a wedding. The wedding was lovely and the food was wonderful by the way, but our initial attempts to navigate the NYC subway were subpar. Unless you're hapless like I am, you don't usually have to pay an extra fare just to take your suitcase with you. Upon arriving in NYC on a Saturday morning, I was in charge of rolling Adam's small suitcase since he had to carry his very heavy and cumbersome rental tuxedo on a hanger. After doing our cost/benefit analysis of whether to buy an unlimited fun pass, we decide to just get a dollar denomination metro card. I enter the subway turnstiles dragging the suitcase behind me and somehow the suitcase handle gets hooked in the turnstile prongs and becomes stuck with a line of people behind me waiting to go through. Displaying somewhat quick thinking and after trying to pry the suitcase from the turnstile prongs, Adam finally slid his metro card a second time paying a extra fare to free the suitcase. Tempers were flaring with indignation and I was especially cranky due to lack of sleep and hunger. I said something like, "Well, I didn't get the suitcase stuck on purpose." Then we had to laugh because the whole hoopla was just comical...two bumpkins in the big city...what is this turnstile contraption you speak of?
Adam and I journeyed to NYC last weekend for a wedding. The wedding was lovely and the food was wonderful by the way, but our initial attempts to navigate the NYC subway were subpar. Unless you're hapless like I am, you don't usually have to pay an extra fare just to take your suitcase with you. Upon arriving in NYC on a Saturday morning, I was in charge of rolling Adam's small suitcase since he had to carry his very heavy and cumbersome rental tuxedo on a hanger. After doing our cost/benefit analysis of whether to buy an unlimited fun pass, we decide to just get a dollar denomination metro card. I enter the subway turnstiles dragging the suitcase behind me and somehow the suitcase handle gets hooked in the turnstile prongs and becomes stuck with a line of people behind me waiting to go through. Displaying somewhat quick thinking and after trying to pry the suitcase from the turnstile prongs, Adam finally slid his metro card a second time paying a extra fare to free the suitcase. Tempers were flaring with indignation and I was especially cranky due to lack of sleep and hunger. I said something like, "Well, I didn't get the suitcase stuck on purpose." Then we had to laugh because the whole hoopla was just comical...two bumpkins in the big city...what is this turnstile contraption you speak of?
Thursday, May 29, 2003
Lee Harvey
I always call it "Lee Harvey as in Oswald, but thankfully most of my friends know I'm referring to Lee Valley Hardware, not the assassin. I've previously posted about Lee Valley and it is just the best because they don't try to be hip, which makes them kind of cool. They sell everything from woodworking tools to gardening equipment to kitchen gadgets and their inventory is gigantic. They always have cool new items except they often classify them under strange pragmatic categories so you've got to happen upon them. My new favorite is the traditional Indian spice caddy and the stacking storage container, which is really an Asian style lunchbox. I'm excited about getting some of these No-Prep Metal Paints to paint some galvanized steel buckets, inspired by an episode of Martha Stewart. They have great service; it's inexpensive and fast. For example: clear topped aluminum containers, Martha Stewart at $15 for service that's "slightly proficient" at best versus Lee Valley at $3.70.. 'Nuf said.
I always call it "Lee Harvey as in Oswald, but thankfully most of my friends know I'm referring to Lee Valley Hardware, not the assassin. I've previously posted about Lee Valley and it is just the best because they don't try to be hip, which makes them kind of cool. They sell everything from woodworking tools to gardening equipment to kitchen gadgets and their inventory is gigantic. They always have cool new items except they often classify them under strange pragmatic categories so you've got to happen upon them. My new favorite is the traditional Indian spice caddy and the stacking storage container, which is really an Asian style lunchbox. I'm excited about getting some of these No-Prep Metal Paints to paint some galvanized steel buckets, inspired by an episode of Martha Stewart. They have great service; it's inexpensive and fast. For example: clear topped aluminum containers, Martha Stewart at $15 for service that's "slightly proficient" at best versus Lee Valley at $3.70.. 'Nuf said.
Wednesday, May 28, 2003
Krispy Kreme--a haiku
Fried pillowy dough
Enrobed perfectly in glaze
Doughnut of my eye
I'm eating some two-day-old Krispy Kreme doughnuts and they're still delicious probably because the glaze that envelops the donuts serves as a form of plastic wrap preventing staleness from descending on my treat. Upon arriving at Penn Station, I ate two Original Glazed and upon leaving, I purchased two dozen assorted doughnuts to share with my friends here in Boston. The woman at the Krispy Kreme counter was a bit "surly" or as Adam put it, a "New Yorker." While I was paying for my doughnuts, Adam, being the affable man he is, chats up "Surly Krispy Kreme Woman" (SKKW). The following is a reconstructed exchange between Adam, SKKW, and Ann.
Adam: So what are some of your favorite donuts?
SKKW: I like the glazed and I really like the lemon filled, they're really my favorite, but she didn't pick any of those.
Ann: I did pick lemon filled. I asked for "two lemon filled, two raspberry filled, two chocolate glazed..."
SKKW: No you didn't.
Ann: But I did ask for lemon, I know I asked for lemon filled.
SKKW: Pchhhh whatever...you didn't ask for lemon. (waving me away)
Ann: (pondering whether to insist she replace some of my donuts with lemon)
SKKW: You ordered lemon...just kidding. Did you see the look on her face? Ha Ha Ha! You should have seen the look on her face.
Adam: Well, we're bringing these to Boston where we don't have Krispy Kremes and we really like lemon.
Ann: You sure I have lemon? (wondering if she's lying and trying to get rid of me)
SKKW: Yeah...you've got some lemon in there.
Ann & Adam: (shell shocked, but walking away)
SKKW: Come back here. (Winks and hands us two free lemon filled doughnuts.)
We did walk away with two free doughnuts, but I'm not sure it was worth the aggravation. I did end up with four lemon filled doughnuts, which is always a treat.
Fried pillowy dough
Enrobed perfectly in glaze
Doughnut of my eye
I'm eating some two-day-old Krispy Kreme doughnuts and they're still delicious probably because the glaze that envelops the donuts serves as a form of plastic wrap preventing staleness from descending on my treat. Upon arriving at Penn Station, I ate two Original Glazed and upon leaving, I purchased two dozen assorted doughnuts to share with my friends here in Boston. The woman at the Krispy Kreme counter was a bit "surly" or as Adam put it, a "New Yorker." While I was paying for my doughnuts, Adam, being the affable man he is, chats up "Surly Krispy Kreme Woman" (SKKW). The following is a reconstructed exchange between Adam, SKKW, and Ann.
Adam: So what are some of your favorite donuts?
SKKW: I like the glazed and I really like the lemon filled, they're really my favorite, but she didn't pick any of those.
Ann: I did pick lemon filled. I asked for "two lemon filled, two raspberry filled, two chocolate glazed..."
SKKW: No you didn't.
Ann: But I did ask for lemon, I know I asked for lemon filled.
SKKW: Pchhhh whatever...you didn't ask for lemon. (waving me away)
Ann: (pondering whether to insist she replace some of my donuts with lemon)
SKKW: You ordered lemon...just kidding. Did you see the look on her face? Ha Ha Ha! You should have seen the look on her face.
Adam: Well, we're bringing these to Boston where we don't have Krispy Kremes and we really like lemon.
Ann: You sure I have lemon? (wondering if she's lying and trying to get rid of me)
SKKW: Yeah...you've got some lemon in there.
Ann & Adam: (shell shocked, but walking away)
SKKW: Come back here. (Winks and hands us two free lemon filled doughnuts.)
We did walk away with two free doughnuts, but I'm not sure it was worth the aggravation. I did end up with four lemon filled doughnuts, which is always a treat.
Tuesday, May 27, 2003
Comparative Hotdogs
Adam and I stopped by Gray's Papaya twice this weekend while in NYC. Talk about cheap eats, 75 cents for a hotdog (toasted bun included) and a wide range of fruity (non-alc) libations. The hotdogs were quite good, a little crunchy on the outside, juicy on the inside, a nicely toasted bun...and did I mention the price? As tasty and inexpensive as Gray's Papaya is, my favorite hotdog is Spike's Junkyard Dogs. Spike's offers beefy hotdogs in freshly baked hearty buns with a myriad of toppings. My favorite is the Texas Ranger, topped with melted cheddar cheese, bacon and BBQ sauce. Even more delicious is the Texas Ranger with sautéed onions, which is called a "Casey Dog" in Providence, but it's a sad hotdog to order because it's a memorial hotdog. One Spike's hotdog at less that $3 fills me up and is the ultimate cheap eats hotdog in my book. Much to my delight, this weekend The Boston Globe proclaimed Spike's Junkyard Dogs as number one on their list. BOOYAH!
*Interesting Factoid: The owner of Spike's Junkyard Dogs also owns Adesso in Providence, a classy California style restaurant. Veggie Dogs are available and are reported to be quite good.
Adam and I stopped by Gray's Papaya twice this weekend while in NYC. Talk about cheap eats, 75 cents for a hotdog (toasted bun included) and a wide range of fruity (non-alc) libations. The hotdogs were quite good, a little crunchy on the outside, juicy on the inside, a nicely toasted bun...and did I mention the price? As tasty and inexpensive as Gray's Papaya is, my favorite hotdog is Spike's Junkyard Dogs. Spike's offers beefy hotdogs in freshly baked hearty buns with a myriad of toppings. My favorite is the Texas Ranger, topped with melted cheddar cheese, bacon and BBQ sauce. Even more delicious is the Texas Ranger with sautéed onions, which is called a "Casey Dog" in Providence, but it's a sad hotdog to order because it's a memorial hotdog. One Spike's hotdog at less that $3 fills me up and is the ultimate cheap eats hotdog in my book. Much to my delight, this weekend The Boston Globe proclaimed Spike's Junkyard Dogs as number one on their list. BOOYAH!
*Interesting Factoid: The owner of Spike's Junkyard Dogs also owns Adesso in Providence, a classy California style restaurant. Veggie Dogs are available and are reported to be quite good.
Friday, May 23, 2003
GUMBALLS
Though I'm not much of a gum chewer, I maintain a "gum bin" just outside my office for my gum loving coworkers. When the Coop used to carry more gum, I filled the gum bin with a plethora of Bubble Yum flavors; Grape and the sour flavors were some favorites. In the interest of preventing cavities and watching our girlish figures, I mostly fill the bin these days with Dentyne Ice, Trident Original Bubble Gum, Big Red, Juicy Fruit and occasionally some Bubble Yum.
This year, I hosted the 2nd Annual Office Easter Egg Hunt on Good Friday with an egg count of 180. While Michelle and I were procuring egg hunt supplies at Target, I came across Bubble Yum Bubble Gum Eggs, egg shaped bubble gum coated with a candy shell. The bubble gum eggs were a great hit with the office or at least Nina really loved them. I was bummed because the bubble gum eggs were seasonal and I hadn't stocked up on them. I got really excited when I found something similar, Bubble Yum Incredible Hulk Giant Green Gumballs, at the drugstore last night so I purchased a bag for Nina.
Because I had never really had a gumball before, I never knew what gumballs were; somehow I thought they were jawbreakers because they're both spherical. I thought the bubble gum eggs were a newfangled product by Bubble Yum, but turns out they were just oblong gumballs. Gumballs are apparently sold everywhere and aren't obscure and seasonal at all. I even took the extra precaution of issuing this egg hunt warning regarding the "esoteric" candy, "there will be some Bubble Yum bubble gum out there. The gum is egg shaped, but has "Bubble Yum" stamped on it so please don't swallow the gum thinking it's candy."
Though I'm not much of a gum chewer, I maintain a "gum bin" just outside my office for my gum loving coworkers. When the Coop used to carry more gum, I filled the gum bin with a plethora of Bubble Yum flavors; Grape and the sour flavors were some favorites. In the interest of preventing cavities and watching our girlish figures, I mostly fill the bin these days with Dentyne Ice, Trident Original Bubble Gum, Big Red, Juicy Fruit and occasionally some Bubble Yum.
This year, I hosted the 2nd Annual Office Easter Egg Hunt on Good Friday with an egg count of 180. While Michelle and I were procuring egg hunt supplies at Target, I came across Bubble Yum Bubble Gum Eggs, egg shaped bubble gum coated with a candy shell. The bubble gum eggs were a great hit with the office or at least Nina really loved them. I was bummed because the bubble gum eggs were seasonal and I hadn't stocked up on them. I got really excited when I found something similar, Bubble Yum Incredible Hulk Giant Green Gumballs, at the drugstore last night so I purchased a bag for Nina.
Because I had never really had a gumball before, I never knew what gumballs were; somehow I thought they were jawbreakers because they're both spherical. I thought the bubble gum eggs were a newfangled product by Bubble Yum, but turns out they were just oblong gumballs. Gumballs are apparently sold everywhere and aren't obscure and seasonal at all. I even took the extra precaution of issuing this egg hunt warning regarding the "esoteric" candy, "there will be some Bubble Yum bubble gum out there. The gum is egg shaped, but has "Bubble Yum" stamped on it so please don't swallow the gum thinking it's candy."
Thursday, May 22, 2003
Cinnabon...how I love thee
I first discovered Cinnabons when I was too young to care about fat, calories and other nutritional considerations. The only Cinnabon I knew of was in Vancouver and though I had never been to Vancouver, I would heat them up and eat them for breakfast whenever I could get my grubby little hands on a box.
While my mom was strict, she was oddly permissive with regards to nutrition and food. Given that cake was considered a breakfast food in my household, donuts and Cinnabons clearly fell within the realm of legitimate breakfasts. (To her credit, I have a fairly healthy view of food.) Loosely translated, she ascribed to a "natural" view on food. Basically, whatever your body craves is what it needs...Cinnabons included.
I spent a month in Vancouver (a.k.a. "The Magical Land of Cinnabons") while in high school and I ate a Cinnabon everyday. It wasn't until several years later, when I discovered just how unhealthy they were, that I realized my slight weight gain that summer had been incorrectly attributed to a latent "growth spurt."
My heart still flutters at the thought of Cinnabons, but I consume them more judiciously. Last fall when Greg, Nina and I went to DC for work, Greg kept egging me to get a Cinnabon when we got to the airport because there was a stand right next to our gate. I had just eaten a huge dinner at TenPenh and couldn't fathom eating a Cinnabon, but I finally acquiesced mainly because I figured out that Greg was really saying he wanted to eat a Cinnabon and also because they smelled too delicious to pass up. The three of us quickly split one before boarding our flight home. No matter how full I am I've never regretted making room for a Cinnabon...they're positively sublime.
I first discovered Cinnabons when I was too young to care about fat, calories and other nutritional considerations. The only Cinnabon I knew of was in Vancouver and though I had never been to Vancouver, I would heat them up and eat them for breakfast whenever I could get my grubby little hands on a box.
While my mom was strict, she was oddly permissive with regards to nutrition and food. Given that cake was considered a breakfast food in my household, donuts and Cinnabons clearly fell within the realm of legitimate breakfasts. (To her credit, I have a fairly healthy view of food.) Loosely translated, she ascribed to a "natural" view on food. Basically, whatever your body craves is what it needs...Cinnabons included.
I spent a month in Vancouver (a.k.a. "The Magical Land of Cinnabons") while in high school and I ate a Cinnabon everyday. It wasn't until several years later, when I discovered just how unhealthy they were, that I realized my slight weight gain that summer had been incorrectly attributed to a latent "growth spurt."
My heart still flutters at the thought of Cinnabons, but I consume them more judiciously. Last fall when Greg, Nina and I went to DC for work, Greg kept egging me to get a Cinnabon when we got to the airport because there was a stand right next to our gate. I had just eaten a huge dinner at TenPenh and couldn't fathom eating a Cinnabon, but I finally acquiesced mainly because I figured out that Greg was really saying he wanted to eat a Cinnabon and also because they smelled too delicious to pass up. The three of us quickly split one before boarding our flight home. No matter how full I am I've never regretted making room for a Cinnabon...they're positively sublime.
Some Mores Happy Hour
Last Friday, we enjoyed S'mores during our happy hour. I procured some Sterno canned heat, skewers, marshmallows, graham crackers, chocolate and thin mint chocolates for this first ever indoor bonfire event. Indoor S'mores, with its element of pyromaniac danger, will most likely never be repeated given that the Sterno flame seemed unpredictable. Mark expressed vocal concerns about the fire hazard, but finally joined in and ate two S'mores. Steve's first marshmallow went up in flames and he was slow to put it out which sent me into a panic. All participants reported back on Monday that they did not suffer any immediate health problems from eating marshmallows roasted in a Sterno flame. All in all, S'mores Happy Hour was a tentative success. If anything else, it was an team building exercise...we had to look out for each other's roasting marshmallows sounding a yelping alarm of panic if marshmallows were catching on fire in a blind spot.
Last Friday, we enjoyed S'mores during our happy hour. I procured some Sterno canned heat, skewers, marshmallows, graham crackers, chocolate and thin mint chocolates for this first ever indoor bonfire event. Indoor S'mores, with its element of pyromaniac danger, will most likely never be repeated given that the Sterno flame seemed unpredictable. Mark expressed vocal concerns about the fire hazard, but finally joined in and ate two S'mores. Steve's first marshmallow went up in flames and he was slow to put it out which sent me into a panic. All participants reported back on Monday that they did not suffer any immediate health problems from eating marshmallows roasted in a Sterno flame. All in all, S'mores Happy Hour was a tentative success. If anything else, it was an team building exercise...we had to look out for each other's roasting marshmallows sounding a yelping alarm of panic if marshmallows were catching on fire in a blind spot.
World's Worst Interview Question---in my experience
Completely out of context with no explanation, I once had an interviewer ask me:
Q: On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your tolerance for boring tasks?
Ann: Could you define that please?
Q: No, just pick a number.
How does one even answer that question? "Gee golly willagers sir, I'm not familiar with this 'scale' you speak of. I just love counting paper clips all day for weeks on end, would that qualify as a one or a ten?"
Needless to say, I don't work for him nor do I count paper clips all day long. I'm happy I have great coworkers who don't intimidate me with nonsensical questions.
Completely out of context with no explanation, I once had an interviewer ask me:
Q: On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your tolerance for boring tasks?
Ann: Could you define that please?
Q: No, just pick a number.
How does one even answer that question? "Gee golly willagers sir, I'm not familiar with this 'scale' you speak of. I just love counting paper clips all day for weeks on end, would that qualify as a one or a ten?"
Needless to say, I don't work for him nor do I count paper clips all day long. I'm happy I have great coworkers who don't intimidate me with nonsensical questions.
Wednesday, May 21, 2003
J*E*L*L*O
For those who enjoy artificial treats, here's a neat trick for Creamy Layered Finger JELLO. You can scale the proportions up or down depending on how much you want to make. For better tips on how to make this JELLO more perfect, check out the "shout out" from Laurel.
1 big box of JELLO
1.5 cups of boiling water
0.5 cups of light cream (or heavy or whipping)
2 envelopes of KNOX unflavored Gelatin.
Dissolve JELLO and Gelatin in boiling water. Pour in mold or pan. Stir in cream so it's evenly distributed. Refrigerate until firm. Cut into small pieces and serve. Yields 2 cups.
The cream will rise and the finger JELLO will become two distinct layers, a clear layer and a creamy layer.
For those who enjoy artificial treats, here's a neat trick for Creamy Layered Finger JELLO. You can scale the proportions up or down depending on how much you want to make. For better tips on how to make this JELLO more perfect, check out the "shout out" from Laurel.
1 big box of JELLO
1.5 cups of boiling water
0.5 cups of light cream (or heavy or whipping)
2 envelopes of KNOX unflavored Gelatin.
Dissolve JELLO and Gelatin in boiling water. Pour in mold or pan. Stir in cream so it's evenly distributed. Refrigerate until firm. Cut into small pieces and serve. Yields 2 cups.
The cream will rise and the finger JELLO will become two distinct layers, a clear layer and a creamy layer.
Mounds Cake
I'm loving my new bundt pan. Last night I baked a Duncan Hines Dark Chocolate Fudge cake with coconut, white chocolate chips and chocolate chips.To prevent my extra goodies from sinking right to the bottom of the pan, I first baked half of the cake batter for a few minutes so the top would set a bit. I then sprinkled in the goodies and baked the remaining cake batter on top. The cake looked really nice when I plopped it out of my nonstick pan and I'm excited to try it tonight with some Vanilla Bean ice cream. YUM!
I tried baking Junior Mint Brownies once, but because I had put in the Junior Mint at the beginning of the baking process, the candy sank right to the bottom adhering stubbornly to the pan. The brownies had these unsightly sunken pits where the Junior Mints had been.
I got the twice-baked cake idea from an episode of Cooking Around Town; one of the chefs first baked half the cake batter for a few minutes before adding the cherry filling and the rest of the cake batter to prevent the cherries from sinking right to the bottom.
Cooking Around Town is my favorite local PBS show. It's really fun because the host visits various local restaurants and the chefs teach you how to make their signature dishes in their own kitchens. The host, Ron Della Chiesa, also hosts some opera radio show and he often makes opera references, which I don't totally get, but he's really funny to watch because he always likes everything and he's just so predictable. Most chefs seem to warm up to him, but he was unable to win over one chef in particular, who was obviously exasperated with him and immune to his charms. He was like an overly eager "ELMO" who enthusiastically wanted to help with everything and you could tell he was grating on her nerves.
Attention Shoppers: Duncan Hines cake mix is on sale for 99 cents at Shaws this week.
I'm loving my new bundt pan. Last night I baked a Duncan Hines Dark Chocolate Fudge cake with coconut, white chocolate chips and chocolate chips.To prevent my extra goodies from sinking right to the bottom of the pan, I first baked half of the cake batter for a few minutes so the top would set a bit. I then sprinkled in the goodies and baked the remaining cake batter on top. The cake looked really nice when I plopped it out of my nonstick pan and I'm excited to try it tonight with some Vanilla Bean ice cream. YUM!
I tried baking Junior Mint Brownies once, but because I had put in the Junior Mint at the beginning of the baking process, the candy sank right to the bottom adhering stubbornly to the pan. The brownies had these unsightly sunken pits where the Junior Mints had been.
I got the twice-baked cake idea from an episode of Cooking Around Town; one of the chefs first baked half the cake batter for a few minutes before adding the cherry filling and the rest of the cake batter to prevent the cherries from sinking right to the bottom.
Cooking Around Town is my favorite local PBS show. It's really fun because the host visits various local restaurants and the chefs teach you how to make their signature dishes in their own kitchens. The host, Ron Della Chiesa, also hosts some opera radio show and he often makes opera references, which I don't totally get, but he's really funny to watch because he always likes everything and he's just so predictable. Most chefs seem to warm up to him, but he was unable to win over one chef in particular, who was obviously exasperated with him and immune to his charms. He was like an overly eager "ELMO" who enthusiastically wanted to help with everything and you could tell he was grating on her nerves.
Attention Shoppers: Duncan Hines cake mix is on sale for 99 cents at Shaws this week.
Tuesday, May 20, 2003
Back when I was your age, we didn't have shoes...
Despite my slightly better than average grasp of twentieth century history and my ability to do basic math, I sometimes experience a disconnect when it comes to exactly how old my mom is. I forget that she can't possibly have experienced anything before the 1950s because I always think parents are old and that they've experienced historical events first hand or at the very least through mediums such as television, newspapers, photographs, etc. The following is a reconstructed scene and conversation.
Scene: I'm in high school and my mom and I are watching Cleopatra with Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton on VHS.
Mom: This is the part where Cleopatra enters the city on a huge float.
Ann: How do you know? Were you there?
Mom: Uhhhh. No...I've seen this movie before.
Ann: Oh!
Obviously, I didn't really think my mom was alive during the Roman Empire, but alas sometimes I'm not so quick on the uptake.
Despite my slightly better than average grasp of twentieth century history and my ability to do basic math, I sometimes experience a disconnect when it comes to exactly how old my mom is. I forget that she can't possibly have experienced anything before the 1950s because I always think parents are old and that they've experienced historical events first hand or at the very least through mediums such as television, newspapers, photographs, etc. The following is a reconstructed scene and conversation.
Scene: I'm in high school and my mom and I are watching Cleopatra with Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton on VHS.
Mom: This is the part where Cleopatra enters the city on a huge float.
Ann: How do you know? Were you there?
Mom: Uhhhh. No...I've seen this movie before.
Ann: Oh!
Obviously, I didn't really think my mom was alive during the Roman Empire, but alas sometimes I'm not so quick on the uptake.
Monday, May 19, 2003
Great New Taste: 100% more Butter
While most people aspire to make healthier baked goods, I have a tendency to inadvertently make perfectly unhealthy delicious baked goods even unhealthier. Last night I christened my new bundt pan purchased with my ill-gotten NCAA March Madness winnings. I made my favorite Best Ever Banana Bread from my FamilyFun Cookbook since I had some frozen over ripened bananas Adam had given me last week for this exact purpose. I was super excited about my new bundt pan because the banana bread looked great on my cake stand.
It was a beautiful morning and I was feeling pretty groovy walking to work when I had an epiphany; I had doubled the amount of butter in the banana bread as the recipe called for. Unfortunately this isn't the first time I've inadvertently doubled the butter in a perfectly fatty recipe. Last Christmas, I made Greg, my boss, a Chocolate Pecan Pie. The following is a reconstructed conversation:
Greg: Thanks for the Chocolate Pecan Pie. It looks great; I'm excited to try it.
Ann: You're welcome, It's really easy to make and it's not that bad for you, only 1/4 cup of butter in the filling...that's only one stick.
Greg: Uhhh, isn't 1/4 cup half a stick because a whole stick is 1/2 cup.
Ann: Yikes...you're right. No wonder the filling wasn't setting last night and it seemed abnormally gooey.
It was super buttery chocolate pecan pie. That weekend, Greg and his wife Helen ate the entire pie with ice cream to boot and the butter levels had been fully disclosed to them. Now that's impressive in my book. I had a bite of the super buttery banana bread this morning and it's super rich. I think I'll have to throw in some sort of health cautionary warning about the banana bread for my roommates. "Warning: This banana bread may cause obesity and heart attacks. Please reduce intake by approximately 50% to compensate for the extra butter I used."
My mind has some sort of short circuit when it comes to butter measurements. I get confused with cups and pounds. I think 1/2 cup is 1/2 pound and I end up using 1 whole cup instead. Jess, helpfully, pointed out that recipes almost always measure butter in cups, not pounds. That's really comforting, not only are fractions problematic for me, I can't read as well.
The other problem is I never make a mental connection between what I observe and what's causing the problem. For instance, I'll think, "Hmmm, this filling is rather gooey and isn't really setting," or "I wonder why there's all this extra butter on the bottom of the bowl, I better scrape and incorporate it into the batter," or "Gee golly this batter looks different from what I remember," but I won't realize that I've used too much butter until after the fact. In retrospect, there were red flags flying up all over the place and it all makes sense. Sometimes, I really wish I didn't do blog-worthy things like this.
Today's Life Lesson: I suppose there are worse things in life like using salt instead of sugar and cancer.
While most people aspire to make healthier baked goods, I have a tendency to inadvertently make perfectly unhealthy delicious baked goods even unhealthier. Last night I christened my new bundt pan purchased with my ill-gotten NCAA March Madness winnings. I made my favorite Best Ever Banana Bread from my FamilyFun Cookbook since I had some frozen over ripened bananas Adam had given me last week for this exact purpose. I was super excited about my new bundt pan because the banana bread looked great on my cake stand.
It was a beautiful morning and I was feeling pretty groovy walking to work when I had an epiphany; I had doubled the amount of butter in the banana bread as the recipe called for. Unfortunately this isn't the first time I've inadvertently doubled the butter in a perfectly fatty recipe. Last Christmas, I made Greg, my boss, a Chocolate Pecan Pie. The following is a reconstructed conversation:
Greg: Thanks for the Chocolate Pecan Pie. It looks great; I'm excited to try it.
Ann: You're welcome, It's really easy to make and it's not that bad for you, only 1/4 cup of butter in the filling...that's only one stick.
Greg: Uhhh, isn't 1/4 cup half a stick because a whole stick is 1/2 cup.
Ann: Yikes...you're right. No wonder the filling wasn't setting last night and it seemed abnormally gooey.
It was super buttery chocolate pecan pie. That weekend, Greg and his wife Helen ate the entire pie with ice cream to boot and the butter levels had been fully disclosed to them. Now that's impressive in my book. I had a bite of the super buttery banana bread this morning and it's super rich. I think I'll have to throw in some sort of health cautionary warning about the banana bread for my roommates. "Warning: This banana bread may cause obesity and heart attacks. Please reduce intake by approximately 50% to compensate for the extra butter I used."
My mind has some sort of short circuit when it comes to butter measurements. I get confused with cups and pounds. I think 1/2 cup is 1/2 pound and I end up using 1 whole cup instead. Jess, helpfully, pointed out that recipes almost always measure butter in cups, not pounds. That's really comforting, not only are fractions problematic for me, I can't read as well.
The other problem is I never make a mental connection between what I observe and what's causing the problem. For instance, I'll think, "Hmmm, this filling is rather gooey and isn't really setting," or "I wonder why there's all this extra butter on the bottom of the bowl, I better scrape and incorporate it into the batter," or "Gee golly this batter looks different from what I remember," but I won't realize that I've used too much butter until after the fact. In retrospect, there were red flags flying up all over the place and it all makes sense. Sometimes, I really wish I didn't do blog-worthy things like this.
Today's Life Lesson: I suppose there are worse things in life like using salt instead of sugar and cancer.
Friday, May 16, 2003
Ye Olde Comeuppance: yet another update to the continued fascination with the word "comeuppance"
Courtesy of Nina, the end of Roger Ebert's review of "Down with Love",
"Down With Love" is no better or worse than the movies that inspired it, but that is a compliment, I think. It recalls a time when society had more rigid rules for the genders, and thus more adventure in transcending them. And it relishes the big scene where a hypocrite gets his comeuppance. The very concept of "comeuppance" is obsolete in these permissive modern times, when few movie characters have a sense of shame and behavior is justified in terms of pure selfishness. Barbara Novak's outrage at sneaky behavior is one of the movie's most refreshing elements from the 1960s--not to say she isn't above a few neat tricks herself.
Courtesy of Nina, the end of Roger Ebert's review of "Down with Love",
"Down With Love" is no better or worse than the movies that inspired it, but that is a compliment, I think. It recalls a time when society had more rigid rules for the genders, and thus more adventure in transcending them. And it relishes the big scene where a hypocrite gets his comeuppance. The very concept of "comeuppance" is obsolete in these permissive modern times, when few movie characters have a sense of shame and behavior is justified in terms of pure selfishness. Barbara Novak's outrage at sneaky behavior is one of the movie's most refreshing elements from the 1960s--not to say she isn't above a few neat tricks herself.
For the Love of Graphs
My friend "Zrad" sent me this hilarious article from the Onion, "Break-Up Made Easier with Colorful Visual Aids." I'm also happy to report, "Zrad" has been enjoying Fluffernutter bagel sandwiches for breakfast and is now a proud owner of his first tub of Fluff along with a companion copy of "The Yummy Book."
Last February, my mom was uncharacteristically bemoaning about her age because she was rolling into her sixth decade, her argument being that she was twice my age. I was quick to point out that her age as a multiple to mine had been decreasing exponentially over the years so she was really getting relatively younger. To visually demonstrate my point, I made her this great line graph in Excel titled "How Old: Mom versus Ann." [The graph resembles the Superman rollar coaster ride without all the extra bumps toward the end, just one huge free fall. She was infinite times older than me when I was a fetus, 26 times older than me when was one and now she's 100% older than me. When she sprightly enters into her second century, she'll only be 33% older than me.] Although I thought my dramatic visual aid was a clever application of my chart making talents, she only found it to be mildly amusing.
My friend "Zrad" sent me this hilarious article from the Onion, "Break-Up Made Easier with Colorful Visual Aids." I'm also happy to report, "Zrad" has been enjoying Fluffernutter bagel sandwiches for breakfast and is now a proud owner of his first tub of Fluff along with a companion copy of "The Yummy Book."
Last February, my mom was uncharacteristically bemoaning about her age because she was rolling into her sixth decade, her argument being that she was twice my age. I was quick to point out that her age as a multiple to mine had been decreasing exponentially over the years so she was really getting relatively younger. To visually demonstrate my point, I made her this great line graph in Excel titled "How Old: Mom versus Ann." [The graph resembles the Superman rollar coaster ride without all the extra bumps toward the end, just one huge free fall. She was infinite times older than me when I was a fetus, 26 times older than me when was one and now she's 100% older than me. When she sprightly enters into her second century, she'll only be 33% older than me.] Although I thought my dramatic visual aid was a clever application of my chart making talents, she only found it to be mildly amusing.
Thursday, May 15, 2003
Sihanouk Times
My favorite section of the Wall Street Journal is the "middle column" that appears in the middle of the front page. Today's edition of the WSJ delivers with a delightful, "In Cambodia, Source of Palace Gossip is Unusually High Up---King Sihanouk Dishes Dirt In a Monthly Bulletin; Q&A With Himself." King Sihanouk ascended to the throne in 1941, exiled twice, served as the Prime Minister and is now the figurehead monarch of Cambodia.
For decades, he's been a hands on type of manager for his "Monthly Documentation Bulletin" writing the articles, interviewing himself in Q&A columns, creating fictional pen names to write particularly hard hitting pieces, etc. He'll print menus, recipes, his medical ailments, cards he gets from his grandchildren, and he'll reprint articles from other publications and add his own sarcastic handwritten annotations. His Monthly Bulletin circulates at around 300 and is distributed free of charge to diplomats, journalists, scholars and other fans.
The man is part The Onion and part company newsletter. He should really publish on the Internet, I'm sure someone could set up a URL for the King of Cambodia. Better yet, he should write his own blog. The building I work in produces a similar monthly newsletter. I've always been partial to propaganda type newsletters so I look forward to reading the glossy one page rag each month. Our building newsletter contains little columns about how many trees we saved through our recycling program, fun events around town, and uncritically enthusiastic movie reviews. My favorite feature is called "Employee Profile of the Month:" usually featuring the newest member of the security staff. Most articles end with a peppy, "If you see John [from Texas], be sure to say 'Howdy!'"
Last summer when Nina was going to Germany on vacation, Kate and Carol created a mock newsletter featuring Nina as the employee of the month. They went to the building management office, which published the newsletter, got the file and created a profile on Nina. Here are some select quotes from Nina's profile:
"Some of her daily tasks include ensuring the security of data, educating the staff about obscure esoteric black black and white silent films...She enjoys vegetarian meals and frequents local establishments such as K2 and Darwin's...So if you see Nina in your travels at 4CC, say 'Hello' or 'Guten tag'!!"
In college, I used to read the newsletter published by food services called the "Stockpot." It was food services propaganda featuring articles on how the beef they served was really quality and what new theme dinners were in the works. My favorite was a Q&A section that answered inquisitive questions from students about compelling issues. The following is a reconstruction.
Q: Why can't we have chicken fingers everyday?
A: The Ratty is not currently equipped with sufficient fryolaters to serve chicken fingers daily. We are featuring this menu item more regularly due to positive student response. We will take your suggestions under consideration when we plan to upgrade the facilities of the Ratty. We may install more fryolaters in the future, which would enable us to serve chicken fingers more frequently.
I'd always aspired to be published in the Stockpot. I'd made it into three newspapers by the time I graduated, but the elusive Stockpot remained out of my reach.
My favorite section of the Wall Street Journal is the "middle column" that appears in the middle of the front page. Today's edition of the WSJ delivers with a delightful, "In Cambodia, Source of Palace Gossip is Unusually High Up---King Sihanouk Dishes Dirt In a Monthly Bulletin; Q&A With Himself." King Sihanouk ascended to the throne in 1941, exiled twice, served as the Prime Minister and is now the figurehead monarch of Cambodia.
For decades, he's been a hands on type of manager for his "Monthly Documentation Bulletin" writing the articles, interviewing himself in Q&A columns, creating fictional pen names to write particularly hard hitting pieces, etc. He'll print menus, recipes, his medical ailments, cards he gets from his grandchildren, and he'll reprint articles from other publications and add his own sarcastic handwritten annotations. His Monthly Bulletin circulates at around 300 and is distributed free of charge to diplomats, journalists, scholars and other fans.
The man is part The Onion and part company newsletter. He should really publish on the Internet, I'm sure someone could set up a URL for the King of Cambodia. Better yet, he should write his own blog. The building I work in produces a similar monthly newsletter. I've always been partial to propaganda type newsletters so I look forward to reading the glossy one page rag each month. Our building newsletter contains little columns about how many trees we saved through our recycling program, fun events around town, and uncritically enthusiastic movie reviews. My favorite feature is called "Employee Profile of the Month:" usually featuring the newest member of the security staff. Most articles end with a peppy, "If you see John [from Texas], be sure to say 'Howdy!'"
Last summer when Nina was going to Germany on vacation, Kate and Carol created a mock newsletter featuring Nina as the employee of the month. They went to the building management office, which published the newsletter, got the file and created a profile on Nina. Here are some select quotes from Nina's profile:
"Some of her daily tasks include ensuring the security of data, educating the staff about obscure esoteric black black and white silent films...She enjoys vegetarian meals and frequents local establishments such as K2 and Darwin's...So if you see Nina in your travels at 4CC, say 'Hello' or 'Guten tag'!!"
In college, I used to read the newsletter published by food services called the "Stockpot." It was food services propaganda featuring articles on how the beef they served was really quality and what new theme dinners were in the works. My favorite was a Q&A section that answered inquisitive questions from students about compelling issues. The following is a reconstruction.
Q: Why can't we have chicken fingers everyday?
A: The Ratty is not currently equipped with sufficient fryolaters to serve chicken fingers daily. We are featuring this menu item more regularly due to positive student response. We will take your suggestions under consideration when we plan to upgrade the facilities of the Ratty. We may install more fryolaters in the future, which would enable us to serve chicken fingers more frequently.
I'd always aspired to be published in the Stockpot. I'd made it into three newspapers by the time I graduated, but the elusive Stockpot remained out of my reach.
Tuesday, May 13, 2003
NEW Coffee-Mate Vanilla Caramel
It's a good thing I don't do most of the grocery shopping for my house because I'm always tempted to try new products. While I know in my head that any NEW product is most likely a scam by the big food conglomerates to squeeze out smaller brands by flexing their brand name muscle and dominating even more of the shelf space at the grocery store, I sometimes lack the willpower required to say "NO!" Do we really need OREO branded everything from cookies to double stuff to coffee creme to dunkers to mini ones to whatever the heck they think of next? Let's be honest, the answer is "NO." My rational brain says that we should all "kick it old school" and eat normal single stuff OREOS, but my will is weak and my heart whines, "I want what's NEW.....WAH WAH WAH!"
Alas, I digress. I recently purchased NEW Vanilla Caramel Coffee-Mate creamer and brought it in to work to share. It's really quite delicious and it's gotten the thumbs up from the taste test panel. It reminds me of a poor man's Starbuck's Caramel Macchiato or this lovely Jamaican coffee I enjoyed from Cafe Zog in Providence with hints of rum and caramel. Kate can attest, it's a real treat.
It's a good thing I don't do most of the grocery shopping for my house because I'm always tempted to try new products. While I know in my head that any NEW product is most likely a scam by the big food conglomerates to squeeze out smaller brands by flexing their brand name muscle and dominating even more of the shelf space at the grocery store, I sometimes lack the willpower required to say "NO!" Do we really need OREO branded everything from cookies to double stuff to coffee creme to dunkers to mini ones to whatever the heck they think of next? Let's be honest, the answer is "NO." My rational brain says that we should all "kick it old school" and eat normal single stuff OREOS, but my will is weak and my heart whines, "I want what's NEW.....WAH WAH WAH!"
Alas, I digress. I recently purchased NEW Vanilla Caramel Coffee-Mate creamer and brought it in to work to share. It's really quite delicious and it's gotten the thumbs up from the taste test panel. It reminds me of a poor man's Starbuck's Caramel Macchiato or this lovely Jamaican coffee I enjoyed from Cafe Zog in Providence with hints of rum and caramel. Kate can attest, it's a real treat.
Monday, May 12, 2003
Teaism
Highlights from my recent weekend jaunt to DC include visiting the Julia Child's exhibit at the Smithsonian, eating S'mores at Cosi, and munching on a delicious pumpkin spice muffin at Firehook Bakery. However, it was my visit to Teaism that was most intriguing. I seriously want to see the business plan for this place. It's this teahouse that serves light meals with an Asian influence. The menu is brief, but offers a wide range of options from Indian Tandoori to Japanese bento boxes to muffins and scones. The scones and Chai tea were wonderful and I secretly plotted to go back the next day.
The decor of the shop is best described as minimalist, "shabby chic," modern, Asian, and most of all, the concept is entirely "Bobo." I think their "mission statement" (click "About," then "Why" for mission statement) further solidifies my thesis, that they're quintessentially "Bobo." I noticed the "distressed" paint on the stairs suggesting age and wear not feasible for a shop that opened in 1996. Corinna thought they might have overlooked the stairs and forgotten to paint them. I, on the other hand, am more cynical. Distressed staircases can't possibly be an afterthought for an establishment that maintains this type of aesthetic. The image they've designed translates down to the last detail; galvanized steel trash cans for the kitchen area when Rubbermaid 30 gallon plastic ones are more practical. Galvanized steel trash cans are retro while Rubbermaid is crassly commercial and most of all plastic.
I may be a design conspiracy nut, but I do admire the style and taste of this teahouse and I certainly wouldn't mind if they expanded to Boston. They offer delicious treats and maybe some of their hipness and style would rub off on me if I drank enough of their wonderful Chai tea.
Highlights from my recent weekend jaunt to DC include visiting the Julia Child's exhibit at the Smithsonian, eating S'mores at Cosi, and munching on a delicious pumpkin spice muffin at Firehook Bakery. However, it was my visit to Teaism that was most intriguing. I seriously want to see the business plan for this place. It's this teahouse that serves light meals with an Asian influence. The menu is brief, but offers a wide range of options from Indian Tandoori to Japanese bento boxes to muffins and scones. The scones and Chai tea were wonderful and I secretly plotted to go back the next day.
The decor of the shop is best described as minimalist, "shabby chic," modern, Asian, and most of all, the concept is entirely "Bobo." I think their "mission statement" (click "About," then "Why" for mission statement) further solidifies my thesis, that they're quintessentially "Bobo." I noticed the "distressed" paint on the stairs suggesting age and wear not feasible for a shop that opened in 1996. Corinna thought they might have overlooked the stairs and forgotten to paint them. I, on the other hand, am more cynical. Distressed staircases can't possibly be an afterthought for an establishment that maintains this type of aesthetic. The image they've designed translates down to the last detail; galvanized steel trash cans for the kitchen area when Rubbermaid 30 gallon plastic ones are more practical. Galvanized steel trash cans are retro while Rubbermaid is crassly commercial and most of all plastic.
I may be a design conspiracy nut, but I do admire the style and taste of this teahouse and I certainly wouldn't mind if they expanded to Boston. They offer delicious treats and maybe some of their hipness and style would rub off on me if I drank enough of their wonderful Chai tea.
Update to Cosmeticcounterphobia
I'm slowly, but surely, getting over my hangups and this weekend marks another triumph for my journey on this road we call "life." Corinna and I successfully procured cosmetics at the Tyson's Corner One mall this weekend without any trauma or angst. "GO US!" Upon Kate's (my coworker) suggestion, I checked out the MAC counter and purchased what I needed and more. [The MAC foundation came in a plastic squeeze tube like my new "Skippy Squeez' It" peanut butter.] The MAC counter was mobbed, but our patience paid off because the salesperson was actually quite good at her job and efficient despite my initial reservations about her dramatic green eye makeup.
Do you have to be licensed to sell makeup because I wouldn't have picked the lip gloss "green eye makeup salesperson with the 'SASSY' tattoo" picked. She suggested this "Lychee Luxe" colored lip-gloss that was pinky orange and urged me to try it on. The color looked horrid in the bottle, but I complied while telepathically trying to communicate to Corinna that our salesperson was "cuckoo" and we should cease to take any more of her color advice. Much to my dismay, I liked pinky orange. Who knew?
Corinna picked up some foundation from the Origins counter and we both experienced an odd, but pleasant reverse sticker shock. Neither one of us had a good sense of how much makeup should cost and makeup counters, conveniently, do not display their prices. We both thought our makeup was going to cost significantly more. At one point I tried to casually grill the Origins salesperson nonchalantly asking her "Have prices gone down recently?" She assured us that prices had remained constant.
Not believing her, I set out to collect some data. My only point of data for cosmetics prices was Prescriptives foundation from four years prior so I needed to gather some current price data in order to perform my analysis. The price they quoted me was comparable to what I paid before so taking inflation into account, I conclude that makeup prices have remained constant, but prices have gone down in terms of real dollars.
I'm slowly, but surely, getting over my hangups and this weekend marks another triumph for my journey on this road we call "life." Corinna and I successfully procured cosmetics at the Tyson's Corner One mall this weekend without any trauma or angst. "GO US!" Upon Kate's (my coworker) suggestion, I checked out the MAC counter and purchased what I needed and more. [The MAC foundation came in a plastic squeeze tube like my new "Skippy Squeez' It" peanut butter.] The MAC counter was mobbed, but our patience paid off because the salesperson was actually quite good at her job and efficient despite my initial reservations about her dramatic green eye makeup.
Do you have to be licensed to sell makeup because I wouldn't have picked the lip gloss "green eye makeup salesperson with the 'SASSY' tattoo" picked. She suggested this "Lychee Luxe" colored lip-gloss that was pinky orange and urged me to try it on. The color looked horrid in the bottle, but I complied while telepathically trying to communicate to Corinna that our salesperson was "cuckoo" and we should cease to take any more of her color advice. Much to my dismay, I liked pinky orange. Who knew?
Corinna picked up some foundation from the Origins counter and we both experienced an odd, but pleasant reverse sticker shock. Neither one of us had a good sense of how much makeup should cost and makeup counters, conveniently, do not display their prices. We both thought our makeup was going to cost significantly more. At one point I tried to casually grill the Origins salesperson nonchalantly asking her "Have prices gone down recently?" She assured us that prices had remained constant.
Not believing her, I set out to collect some data. My only point of data for cosmetics prices was Prescriptives foundation from four years prior so I needed to gather some current price data in order to perform my analysis. The price they quoted me was comparable to what I paid before so taking inflation into account, I conclude that makeup prices have remained constant, but prices have gone down in terms of real dollars.
Friday, May 09, 2003
Masticating
How many times do you masticate or chew your food? The recommended number of chews rings in at around 30 per bite of food, but essentially you're supposed to chew your food until it's pulpy or liquid. Unlike most folks who don't chew enough, I chew at least the recommended 30 times if not more. Usually, it's not a problem if I'm breaking bread with folks who eat more than me: more chews, but less food usually means approximately the same amount of chewing time.
Unfortunately, I'm not very good at multitasking when it comes to eating and my whole chewing thing doesn't help matters either. For instance, sometimes I have a hard time holding a conversation while eating. I've gotten better about eating in front of the TV, but I used to sit slack jawed in front of the TV with my fork suspended mid air between commercial breaks. Every now and then Adam has to gently nudge me to stop talking or stop staring at the TV and eat my dinner.
During one turkey dinner with my college roommates and our friend Seth and his house of guys, my propensity to chew a lot became an embarrassing liability. Somehow, someone (probably Kellie or Corinna, maybe Sara) made it known that I chewed my food a lot. The conversation about my chewing habits quickly degenerated into a count off as I chewed my food. "One, Two, Three...Ten... Twenty-Five," right around twenty-five chews my neurotic stream of consciousness starts and my thoughts go something like this, "Twenty-five chews, that's getting close to the recommended thirty chews. Is my food pulpy enough? Am I chewing too much? Will it snow tomorrow? Am I not chewing enough? Will I get a tummy ache? I only have five chews left, I better make them good ones." Meanwhile, as I'm pondering, the verbal count continues and they chant, "Twenty-Nine, Thirty, Thirty-One...I can't believe you're chewing your Mashed Potatoes...Forty-Six...Fifty-One."
How can one enjoy their dinner under such trying conditions?
How many times do you masticate or chew your food? The recommended number of chews rings in at around 30 per bite of food, but essentially you're supposed to chew your food until it's pulpy or liquid. Unlike most folks who don't chew enough, I chew at least the recommended 30 times if not more. Usually, it's not a problem if I'm breaking bread with folks who eat more than me: more chews, but less food usually means approximately the same amount of chewing time.
Unfortunately, I'm not very good at multitasking when it comes to eating and my whole chewing thing doesn't help matters either. For instance, sometimes I have a hard time holding a conversation while eating. I've gotten better about eating in front of the TV, but I used to sit slack jawed in front of the TV with my fork suspended mid air between commercial breaks. Every now and then Adam has to gently nudge me to stop talking or stop staring at the TV and eat my dinner.
During one turkey dinner with my college roommates and our friend Seth and his house of guys, my propensity to chew a lot became an embarrassing liability. Somehow, someone (probably Kellie or Corinna, maybe Sara) made it known that I chewed my food a lot. The conversation about my chewing habits quickly degenerated into a count off as I chewed my food. "One, Two, Three...Ten... Twenty-Five," right around twenty-five chews my neurotic stream of consciousness starts and my thoughts go something like this, "Twenty-five chews, that's getting close to the recommended thirty chews. Is my food pulpy enough? Am I chewing too much? Will it snow tomorrow? Am I not chewing enough? Will I get a tummy ache? I only have five chews left, I better make them good ones." Meanwhile, as I'm pondering, the verbal count continues and they chant, "Twenty-Nine, Thirty, Thirty-One...I can't believe you're chewing your Mashed Potatoes...Forty-Six...Fifty-One."
How can one enjoy their dinner under such trying conditions?
Smoosh Ins
The Wall Street Journal reported yesterday that "smoosh in" Ice cream will supplant the last ice cream craze that revolutionized ice cream consumption, premium ice cream such as Ben & Jerry's which in turn had previously supplanted airy Neapolitan ice creams from a carton. The article credits Boston for "smoosh in" ice cream phenomenon, Steve's and Herrell's both "smoosh in" toppings into ice creams on ice cold marble counters using heavy duty ice cream spades.
While Steve's and Herrell's remain independent ice cream stores, Cold Stone Creamery was cited as one of the companies poised to become the Starbucks of "smoosh ins" aiming for 1000 stores in the next year or two. [These ambitious plans remind me of Starbuck's whole 2000 by year 2000 campaign.] One of their stores opened up in the town I lived while I was in college, right on Main Street as part of the city's effort to gentrify the downtown business district. I always make a point of stopping by each time I'm home because the ice cream was premium and really fresh.
I've always wanted to try the places where you choose the ice cream and the toppings and it all gets thrown into a machine that cranks the mixed up ice cream treat like a soft serve cone. You can infuse fruit, nuts, candy, just about anything into your ice cream. There's one near my house and murmurings of other places scattered around the city. I suppose in the end, all these are perhaps highbrow variations on the trusty old Dairy Queen Blizzard, the Friendly's Cyclone and the McDonald's McFlurry, all of which I also enjoy.
The Wall Street Journal reported yesterday that "smoosh in" Ice cream will supplant the last ice cream craze that revolutionized ice cream consumption, premium ice cream such as Ben & Jerry's which in turn had previously supplanted airy Neapolitan ice creams from a carton. The article credits Boston for "smoosh in" ice cream phenomenon, Steve's and Herrell's both "smoosh in" toppings into ice creams on ice cold marble counters using heavy duty ice cream spades.
While Steve's and Herrell's remain independent ice cream stores, Cold Stone Creamery was cited as one of the companies poised to become the Starbucks of "smoosh ins" aiming for 1000 stores in the next year or two. [These ambitious plans remind me of Starbuck's whole 2000 by year 2000 campaign.] One of their stores opened up in the town I lived while I was in college, right on Main Street as part of the city's effort to gentrify the downtown business district. I always make a point of stopping by each time I'm home because the ice cream was premium and really fresh.
I've always wanted to try the places where you choose the ice cream and the toppings and it all gets thrown into a machine that cranks the mixed up ice cream treat like a soft serve cone. You can infuse fruit, nuts, candy, just about anything into your ice cream. There's one near my house and murmurings of other places scattered around the city. I suppose in the end, all these are perhaps highbrow variations on the trusty old Dairy Queen Blizzard, the Friendly's Cyclone and the McDonald's McFlurry, all of which I also enjoy.
Thursday, May 08, 2003
Gift Piggy...Oink Oink!
I'm a "Gift Piggy." While I love getting gifts, I'm more a "gift piggy" when it comes to giving gifts. I love giving gifts so much that I'm not above "inventing" holidays (much like the greeting card industry) to celebrate. I once justified leaving treats for my coworkers by declaring it "Happy Jamaica Day." This was somewhat legit, I got my information from bluemountain.com the e-card site, but they’re a bit liberal in their definition of what constitutes a “holiday.” However, I'm not Jamaican and none of my coworkers are either, we don't even have ancestors from Jamaica.
Recently I won my entire office NCAA basketball pool and I bought everyone presents with my winnings. How crazy is that, I don’t even follow basketball and I won $260. I have to admit that I did “pray” that I would win so I could buy presents for everyone. I felt that praying to better my betting odds was “OK” as long as I intended the money for good. I even considered writing Syracuse a letter just to let them know that I’d been praying sporadically that they, and I, would win. "Christmas in April" was totally fun for everyone, especially me because I had yet another reason (and extra illgotten gain) to buy and wrap fun presents for my friends.
Every year I start pondering about Christmas presents earlier and earlier in the calendar year. Last year, I started making stuff around August. Today, I started pondering about Christmas 2003 and it's only May. [Please save the exasperated eye rolling for those who can't commiserate with my sentiments.] Even I have to admit, May is disturbingly early to be thinking about Christmas.
Over the last few years, I’ve managed my Christmas and Birthday lists with respective Excel spreadsheets. I keep track of my progress for each family member, friend, housemate, coworker, etc. whether I've acquired their gift, made it, baked it, wrapped it, or mailed it. At some point every Christmas season I get a bit overwhelmed because I've got 40 folks on my gift list and at least another 30 more for Christmas cards. [Note: something as small as a tin of altoids counts as a "gift" as long as I wrap it.] On the other hand, there are times when I find something really cool that I want to get for lots of people and I get a bit bummed wishing I had more friends, more resources and more reasons to give gifts.
I've started keeping a small notebook in my bag so I can jot down gift ideas for certain friends while I'm out and about. If I only had a modicum of the same organizational energy for organizing my office, I probably wouldn't be sitting behind a desk haphazardly piled with documents, pens, books and whatnot.
All in all, I just really enjoy gift giving. Sometimes I think it’s a bit lame and embarrassing to get that excited about giving gifts, but then again I’ve discovered that most people like getting thoughtful gifts (or “ useless crap”). I suppose it all depends on what your perspective is.
I'm a "Gift Piggy." While I love getting gifts, I'm more a "gift piggy" when it comes to giving gifts. I love giving gifts so much that I'm not above "inventing" holidays (much like the greeting card industry) to celebrate. I once justified leaving treats for my coworkers by declaring it "Happy Jamaica Day." This was somewhat legit, I got my information from bluemountain.com the e-card site, but they’re a bit liberal in their definition of what constitutes a “holiday.” However, I'm not Jamaican and none of my coworkers are either, we don't even have ancestors from Jamaica.
Recently I won my entire office NCAA basketball pool and I bought everyone presents with my winnings. How crazy is that, I don’t even follow basketball and I won $260. I have to admit that I did “pray” that I would win so I could buy presents for everyone. I felt that praying to better my betting odds was “OK” as long as I intended the money for good. I even considered writing Syracuse a letter just to let them know that I’d been praying sporadically that they, and I, would win. "Christmas in April" was totally fun for everyone, especially me because I had yet another reason (and extra illgotten gain) to buy and wrap fun presents for my friends.
Every year I start pondering about Christmas presents earlier and earlier in the calendar year. Last year, I started making stuff around August. Today, I started pondering about Christmas 2003 and it's only May. [Please save the exasperated eye rolling for those who can't commiserate with my sentiments.] Even I have to admit, May is disturbingly early to be thinking about Christmas.
Over the last few years, I’ve managed my Christmas and Birthday lists with respective Excel spreadsheets. I keep track of my progress for each family member, friend, housemate, coworker, etc. whether I've acquired their gift, made it, baked it, wrapped it, or mailed it. At some point every Christmas season I get a bit overwhelmed because I've got 40 folks on my gift list and at least another 30 more for Christmas cards. [Note: something as small as a tin of altoids counts as a "gift" as long as I wrap it.] On the other hand, there are times when I find something really cool that I want to get for lots of people and I get a bit bummed wishing I had more friends, more resources and more reasons to give gifts.
I've started keeping a small notebook in my bag so I can jot down gift ideas for certain friends while I'm out and about. If I only had a modicum of the same organizational energy for organizing my office, I probably wouldn't be sitting behind a desk haphazardly piled with documents, pens, books and whatnot.
All in all, I just really enjoy gift giving. Sometimes I think it’s a bit lame and embarrassing to get that excited about giving gifts, but then again I’ve discovered that most people like getting thoughtful gifts (or “ useless crap”). I suppose it all depends on what your perspective is.
Wednesday, May 07, 2003
Dry Erase "Art"
I inherited a dry erase board a few years back that sported a message in childlike scrawl that looked like "Momy." The woman who left me my old office along with the dry erase board was a mom and had a toddler and a small baby. I can only deduce that the message was supposed to be "MOMMY" because I subsequently found abandoned legal pads also featuring similar handwriting and sentiments.
For a long time I didn't erase whatever scrawl was left on what was now my board. I felt kind of bad eliminating the last evidence of a cute kid having spent time in my office. This reluctance has turned into a pattern for me. I've never really written any messages on my board since then and I rarely erase the "art" my coworkers leave on my board. While I do enjoy it and it cracks me up whenever I look at my board, I can barely even remember when some of this "art" was created or who created it.
Here's a mental snapshot of what presently resides on my white board. In particular I have three pieces of dry erase "art" I'd like to highlight. They are intermingled amongst some fun flowers, five point stars, a cupcake, and random cartoon guy wearing a red shirt, a huge grin and spiky hair on a round head with little nubbin ears, but these three pieces still maintain their own separateness.
1. I should really put this on a T-Shirt and capitalize on what could be the next anthem for a disenchanted and ambivalent generation of "yutes." Nina has written "What the heck? What's going on? WHO KNOWS?" I think I'd put the slogan on the front of a black shirt and on the back, a peace sign that reads "NO NUKES" which incidentally also appears on my white board courtesy of Nina. I'm not sure if she's referencing something specific or if it's a general sentiment, but it's hilarious to me because it's so random.
2. The next is a visual representation (slight exaggeration) of my very low tolerance of snow. It reads "Snow Tolerance" on top with the following names in order of snow tolerance, "Jess...Nina...Ann." I should also add that there is a bracket drawn between Nina and Ann that is labeled "x100." This piece of dry erase "art" intends to communicate that Jess has the highest tolerance for snow and enjoys snow. Nina is a native New Englander and enjoys snow, but less than Jess. Lastly, Ann (being from LA or "lala-land") hates snow and tolerates snow 100 times less than Nina. While Nina's tolerance of snow is only one unit less than Jess' tolerance, Ann's tolerance is 100 units less than Nina. "Ann Hates Snow and being Cold." All of these things are very true and will probably never change.
3. "Oxycotton: 80mg" [artist unknown] is the last message separated form all others neatly sitting on the lower left corner of the board. I can't remember who left this one, but it does not refer to "The look the feel of Cotton, the fabric of our lives," but is a misspelled reference to the infamous opiate reckless "yutes" hold up pharmacies for. If you notice most drugstores now have signs prominently displayed on their doors that read something like this "We do not carry Oxycontin on the premises. You may mail order Oxycontin, but we do not have any on the premises." The underlying message of these signs is, "We do not carry the goods, the dope, please don't kill us, we don't have what you're looking for, but we do carry shampoo and novelty candy so please come again." Why "Oxycotton: 80mg?" Work related at some point, but it's funny to me because I always think about cotton even though I know that it's referencing something a little darker than "the fabric of our lives."
I inherited a dry erase board a few years back that sported a message in childlike scrawl that looked like "Momy." The woman who left me my old office along with the dry erase board was a mom and had a toddler and a small baby. I can only deduce that the message was supposed to be "MOMMY" because I subsequently found abandoned legal pads also featuring similar handwriting and sentiments.
For a long time I didn't erase whatever scrawl was left on what was now my board. I felt kind of bad eliminating the last evidence of a cute kid having spent time in my office. This reluctance has turned into a pattern for me. I've never really written any messages on my board since then and I rarely erase the "art" my coworkers leave on my board. While I do enjoy it and it cracks me up whenever I look at my board, I can barely even remember when some of this "art" was created or who created it.
Here's a mental snapshot of what presently resides on my white board. In particular I have three pieces of dry erase "art" I'd like to highlight. They are intermingled amongst some fun flowers, five point stars, a cupcake, and random cartoon guy wearing a red shirt, a huge grin and spiky hair on a round head with little nubbin ears, but these three pieces still maintain their own separateness.
1. I should really put this on a T-Shirt and capitalize on what could be the next anthem for a disenchanted and ambivalent generation of "yutes." Nina has written "What the heck? What's going on? WHO KNOWS?" I think I'd put the slogan on the front of a black shirt and on the back, a peace sign that reads "NO NUKES" which incidentally also appears on my white board courtesy of Nina. I'm not sure if she's referencing something specific or if it's a general sentiment, but it's hilarious to me because it's so random.
2. The next is a visual representation (slight exaggeration) of my very low tolerance of snow. It reads "Snow Tolerance" on top with the following names in order of snow tolerance, "Jess...Nina...Ann." I should also add that there is a bracket drawn between Nina and Ann that is labeled "x100." This piece of dry erase "art" intends to communicate that Jess has the highest tolerance for snow and enjoys snow. Nina is a native New Englander and enjoys snow, but less than Jess. Lastly, Ann (being from LA or "lala-land") hates snow and tolerates snow 100 times less than Nina. While Nina's tolerance of snow is only one unit less than Jess' tolerance, Ann's tolerance is 100 units less than Nina. "Ann Hates Snow and being Cold." All of these things are very true and will probably never change.
3. "Oxycotton: 80mg" [artist unknown] is the last message separated form all others neatly sitting on the lower left corner of the board. I can't remember who left this one, but it does not refer to "The look the feel of Cotton, the fabric of our lives," but is a misspelled reference to the infamous opiate reckless "yutes" hold up pharmacies for. If you notice most drugstores now have signs prominently displayed on their doors that read something like this "We do not carry Oxycontin on the premises. You may mail order Oxycontin, but we do not have any on the premises." The underlying message of these signs is, "We do not carry the goods, the dope, please don't kill us, we don't have what you're looking for, but we do carry shampoo and novelty candy so please come again." Why "Oxycotton: 80mg?" Work related at some point, but it's funny to me because I always think about cotton even though I know that it's referencing something a little darker than "the fabric of our lives."
Update on Chicken Fingers at the Ratty
Corinna would like me to clarify that she does enjoy Chicken Fingers, but doesn't like eating “greasy bad for you” foods at lunchtime, which is the only time Chicken Fingers are served at the Ratty. I'd like to welcome her into the "Chicken Finger Fan Club," but her membership may be restricted to that of a "Dabbler" because true full fledged "Connoisseurs" of the Chicken Finger are, unfortunately, ready to imbibe at all hours of the day. She'll probably live to see 100 since she comes from an excellent genetic pool that bodes well for any geriatric aspirations.
Public Service Announcement: Please do not aspire to be a Chicken Finger “Connoisseur,” it’s bad for your health. “Dabbling” in moderation is the preferred method.
Corinna would like me to clarify that she does enjoy Chicken Fingers, but doesn't like eating “greasy bad for you” foods at lunchtime, which is the only time Chicken Fingers are served at the Ratty. I'd like to welcome her into the "Chicken Finger Fan Club," but her membership may be restricted to that of a "Dabbler" because true full fledged "Connoisseurs" of the Chicken Finger are, unfortunately, ready to imbibe at all hours of the day. She'll probably live to see 100 since she comes from an excellent genetic pool that bodes well for any geriatric aspirations.
Public Service Announcement: Please do not aspire to be a Chicken Finger “Connoisseur,” it’s bad for your health. “Dabbling” in moderation is the preferred method.
Rosebud
The Wang Center in Boston is showing Citizen Kane on the big screen next Monday, May 12th at 7pm and it's FREE. My friend Nina once printed the entire screenplay for Citizen Kane off the Internet so she may be at there on Monday reading her script with her itty bitty book light. If you see her there, be sure to say "Hi Nina, how's it going?"
The Wang Center in Boston is showing Citizen Kane on the big screen next Monday, May 12th at 7pm and it's FREE. My friend Nina once printed the entire screenplay for Citizen Kane off the Internet so she may be at there on Monday reading her script with her itty bitty book light. If you see her there, be sure to say "Hi Nina, how's it going?"
Tuesday, May 06, 2003
Skippy Squeez' It
Last Friday at work, we were able to partake in "Happy Hour" since things weren't terribly busy. "Happy Hour" is really "Snack Hour" in my office since we no longer have alcohol. We pop some popcorn and try to create other snacks using the food we have in the office. One week we tried to make Rice Krispy Treats using small packages of cereal, marshmallow fluff and margarine. Last week we made classy Fluffernutter hors d'oeuvres on Ritz crackers. We ran out of squishy white bread so we had to make do.
Peanut butter and marshmallow fluff on a Ritz is pretty tasty, but kind of messy and sticky to make. We kept getting peanut butter on the marshmallow fluff knife. I commented that they should make peanut butter and marshmallow fluff in a tube so we could squeeze it out like toothpaste. Lo and behold, I walked into my office this morning and saw a tube of Skippy Squeez' It squeezable peanut butter in a tube on my desk. It was from my very thoughtful coworker Jessica who saw it advertised over the weekend.
I've already investigated the marshmallow fluff, it doesn't come in squeezable form, but I think it should. I did discover that for 25 cents, you can order the 32 page recipe pamphlet from the Fluff people...it's appropriately called "The Yummy Book."
Last Friday at work, we were able to partake in "Happy Hour" since things weren't terribly busy. "Happy Hour" is really "Snack Hour" in my office since we no longer have alcohol. We pop some popcorn and try to create other snacks using the food we have in the office. One week we tried to make Rice Krispy Treats using small packages of cereal, marshmallow fluff and margarine. Last week we made classy Fluffernutter hors d'oeuvres on Ritz crackers. We ran out of squishy white bread so we had to make do.
Peanut butter and marshmallow fluff on a Ritz is pretty tasty, but kind of messy and sticky to make. We kept getting peanut butter on the marshmallow fluff knife. I commented that they should make peanut butter and marshmallow fluff in a tube so we could squeeze it out like toothpaste. Lo and behold, I walked into my office this morning and saw a tube of Skippy Squeez' It squeezable peanut butter in a tube on my desk. It was from my very thoughtful coworker Jessica who saw it advertised over the weekend.
I've already investigated the marshmallow fluff, it doesn't come in squeezable form, but I think it should. I did discover that for 25 cents, you can order the 32 page recipe pamphlet from the Fluff people...it's appropriately called "The Yummy Book."
Ads
I'm currently using the free blogspot service, which means my blog has a banner ad on the top. In the past, I've noticed ads for baking pans on my blog. Today, I noticed a new ad for a zone diet of some sort. I clicked on the refresh button a dozen times and my limited sample of observations has yielded the following conclusion: my blog carries three types of ads: baking supplies, diet programs and newspaper subscriptions. I wonder if they run a filter on my blog to determine what type of ad to run. I'm starting to think I should buy some character cake pans and subscribe to the New York Times, but I'm not quite on board with the whole zone diet thing. Hmmm…it seems that blogspot.com has opinions about my consumption patterns.
I feel a bit self conscious, I hope big brother blogspot.com doesn't think I eat donuts everyday because I don't. I'll have you know that I ate a salad and some creme brulee for dinner on Sunday.
I'm currently using the free blogspot service, which means my blog has a banner ad on the top. In the past, I've noticed ads for baking pans on my blog. Today, I noticed a new ad for a zone diet of some sort. I clicked on the refresh button a dozen times and my limited sample of observations has yielded the following conclusion: my blog carries three types of ads: baking supplies, diet programs and newspaper subscriptions. I wonder if they run a filter on my blog to determine what type of ad to run. I'm starting to think I should buy some character cake pans and subscribe to the New York Times, but I'm not quite on board with the whole zone diet thing. Hmmm…it seems that blogspot.com has opinions about my consumption patterns.
I feel a bit self conscious, I hope big brother blogspot.com doesn't think I eat donuts everyday because I don't. I'll have you know that I ate a salad and some creme brulee for dinner on Sunday.
Everything Cookie
I bake this cookie recipe from Martha Stewart fairly often. I use 1 cup of chocolate chips rather than the 4.5 oz of chocolate chunks because chocolate chips are easier. Next I use 1 cup of dried cranberries instead of the 1 cup of dried cherries. You can find toffee bits in the baking section of the supermarket or you could crush some toffee bars yourself if you're feeling ambitious.
I used to shell out more for the dried cherries, but my friends kept referring to my cookies as "those cranberry chocolate chip oatmeal cookies" so I decided that downgrading to dried cranberries wasn't going to cause much of an uproar. At $2.99 for a "wee" package of cherries barely big enough for one batch of cookies versus $7 for a "freakin huge" 3 pound bag of dried cranberries from Costco, I'm happy to make the substitution. The less I spend on dried cherries everyone thinks are dried cranberries, the more resources I have to spend on butter, flour and other stuff.
Lately I've added dried sweetened coconut to the cookies. I would reduce the other add in ingredients (oatmeal, cranberries, chocolate chips, toffee bits) by a little bit and replace that amount with the coconut. I threw in a whole cup of coconut along with the full allotment of other ingredients one time and Adam told me the cookies were great, but were on the cusp between "everything yummy in this cookie and I'm so excited" and "too many yummy things in this cookie and I'm overwhelmed." It's a fine distinction and you'll have to figure out what your threshold is so proceed with caution.
I bake this cookie recipe from Martha Stewart fairly often. I use 1 cup of chocolate chips rather than the 4.5 oz of chocolate chunks because chocolate chips are easier. Next I use 1 cup of dried cranberries instead of the 1 cup of dried cherries. You can find toffee bits in the baking section of the supermarket or you could crush some toffee bars yourself if you're feeling ambitious.
I used to shell out more for the dried cherries, but my friends kept referring to my cookies as "those cranberry chocolate chip oatmeal cookies" so I decided that downgrading to dried cranberries wasn't going to cause much of an uproar. At $2.99 for a "wee" package of cherries barely big enough for one batch of cookies versus $7 for a "freakin huge" 3 pound bag of dried cranberries from Costco, I'm happy to make the substitution. The less I spend on dried cherries everyone thinks are dried cranberries, the more resources I have to spend on butter, flour and other stuff.
Lately I've added dried sweetened coconut to the cookies. I would reduce the other add in ingredients (oatmeal, cranberries, chocolate chips, toffee bits) by a little bit and replace that amount with the coconut. I threw in a whole cup of coconut along with the full allotment of other ingredients one time and Adam told me the cookies were great, but were on the cusp between "everything yummy in this cookie and I'm so excited" and "too many yummy things in this cookie and I'm overwhelmed." It's a fine distinction and you'll have to figure out what your threshold is so proceed with caution.
Monday, May 05, 2003
Cosmeticcounterphobia
I'm not sure if it's an actual phobia, but I've definitely got it. I'm fearful of cosmetic counters and I actively avoid them. I'll quickly skirt by the perfume spritzers to get to the handbag department unaccosted. Unfortunately I walk by the cosmetic ladies like they're mentally unstable folks who loudly rant about the end of the world or about conspiracies to anyone who will listen; I walk very quickly and with my head down avoiding any eye contact with the overly eager and deranged, but nice looking women.
Mostly I'm scared I'll walk away from one with a bagful of unwanted cosmetics and skin creams because I had a mild, but mentally paralyzing panic attack and no longer know how to say, "No thank you, I'm not looking for cornflower blue eye shadow." I'm slowly getting better about it, but I'm still a long way off. A few months ago I bought moisturizer on my own with very little commotion, but I need to buy foundation and lipstick next week. I'm enlisting my friend Corinna's help when I visit her in DC next weekend. She's actually excited about the excursion and I trust she won't let me buy anything that makes me look grotesque.
Part of my problem is hereditary; my mom doesn't wear makeup so we're both basically clueless about such matters. My mom bravely ventured out with me one winter break four years ago to buy some foundation and face powder and stuff. She had a pretty good strategy, which I may employ again, when it came to picking which makeup counter to go to. We surveyed all the cosmetic counter sales people and determined which one had on makeup we liked the best. We didn't trust the Lancome girls who looked like they were wearing an inch of makeup on their faces. We deduced they would make me look overly made up and I would lose the ability to move my face. We picked a nice sales person at Prescriptives who was wearing minimal, but still nice looking makeup.
I'm not sure if it's an actual phobia, but I've definitely got it. I'm fearful of cosmetic counters and I actively avoid them. I'll quickly skirt by the perfume spritzers to get to the handbag department unaccosted. Unfortunately I walk by the cosmetic ladies like they're mentally unstable folks who loudly rant about the end of the world or about conspiracies to anyone who will listen; I walk very quickly and with my head down avoiding any eye contact with the overly eager and deranged, but nice looking women.
Mostly I'm scared I'll walk away from one with a bagful of unwanted cosmetics and skin creams because I had a mild, but mentally paralyzing panic attack and no longer know how to say, "No thank you, I'm not looking for cornflower blue eye shadow." I'm slowly getting better about it, but I'm still a long way off. A few months ago I bought moisturizer on my own with very little commotion, but I need to buy foundation and lipstick next week. I'm enlisting my friend Corinna's help when I visit her in DC next weekend. She's actually excited about the excursion and I trust she won't let me buy anything that makes me look grotesque.
Part of my problem is hereditary; my mom doesn't wear makeup so we're both basically clueless about such matters. My mom bravely ventured out with me one winter break four years ago to buy some foundation and face powder and stuff. She had a pretty good strategy, which I may employ again, when it came to picking which makeup counter to go to. We surveyed all the cosmetic counter sales people and determined which one had on makeup we liked the best. We didn't trust the Lancome girls who looked like they were wearing an inch of makeup on their faces. We deduced they would make me look overly made up and I would lose the ability to move my face. We picked a nice sales person at Prescriptives who was wearing minimal, but still nice looking makeup.
Scones
One of my favorite cookbooks is the Family Fun Cookbook formerly known as the Disney Family Cookbook. It's got tons of pictures, easy recipes and little tips like learning math with cereal and how to bake a dinosaur cake. It's like How to Cook Everything, except Ann-friendly and with color photos. I especially like the pictures of children enjoying cooking and baking They're always so cheerful wearing their too big aprons and comically floppy chef's hats. They're very clean looking kids with the exception of an adorable and strategically placed poof of flour in their hair and on their faces when they're baking. I think the little Asian girl enjoying a bowl of sesame noodles is especially cute.
The Best Ever Banana Bread recipe and the Fruit Filled Scones recipe are very yummy and very simple to make. The banana bread recipe requires five ripe bananas, which limits the frequency I make it because I can never seem to gather five ripe bananas. I have to plan ahead and be deliberate if I want five bananas for baking, but the banana bread is super moist and delicious because the almost obscene amount of bananas in it. I make the scones more frequently. Adam really likes them and often requests scones with golden raisins. (Unfortunately some of my coworkers detest golden raisins likening their physical appearance to "boogers.") Yesterday I made a batch with golden raisins and one with dried cranberries and pecans. Sometimes I add some fun chocolate chips. Here's the recipe for your enjoyment.
Scones
2 cups flour
1/4 cup sugar
1 tsp cream of tartar
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup butter (1 stick) cut into a few smaller pieces
2/3-3/4 cup milk
3/4-1 cup add ins (dried fruit, nuts, chocolate chips, etc)
Mix together flour, sugar, cream of tartar, baking soda and salt in a bowl. Combine butter and flour mixture and blend by hand or with a mixer until mixture has a course crumbly texture. Mix in milk until mixture becomes doughy and holds together. Mix in the add ins. Just divide dough into even mounds onto a baking sheet and bake at 400 degrees F until tops start to turn light brown.
The instructions say to pat the dough out and cut it into smaller triangles, but I don't follow these directions because the dough is too sticky and it's too much of a project. I use my large cookie scoop and scoop out the dough onto a baking sheet. My scones look more like scoops of ice cream than actual triangular scones. However they taste yummy so I can justify taking the easy way out.
One of my favorite cookbooks is the Family Fun Cookbook formerly known as the Disney Family Cookbook. It's got tons of pictures, easy recipes and little tips like learning math with cereal and how to bake a dinosaur cake. It's like How to Cook Everything, except Ann-friendly and with color photos. I especially like the pictures of children enjoying cooking and baking They're always so cheerful wearing their too big aprons and comically floppy chef's hats. They're very clean looking kids with the exception of an adorable and strategically placed poof of flour in their hair and on their faces when they're baking. I think the little Asian girl enjoying a bowl of sesame noodles is especially cute.
The Best Ever Banana Bread recipe and the Fruit Filled Scones recipe are very yummy and very simple to make. The banana bread recipe requires five ripe bananas, which limits the frequency I make it because I can never seem to gather five ripe bananas. I have to plan ahead and be deliberate if I want five bananas for baking, but the banana bread is super moist and delicious because the almost obscene amount of bananas in it. I make the scones more frequently. Adam really likes them and often requests scones with golden raisins. (Unfortunately some of my coworkers detest golden raisins likening their physical appearance to "boogers.") Yesterday I made a batch with golden raisins and one with dried cranberries and pecans. Sometimes I add some fun chocolate chips. Here's the recipe for your enjoyment.
Scones
2 cups flour
1/4 cup sugar
1 tsp cream of tartar
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup butter (1 stick) cut into a few smaller pieces
2/3-3/4 cup milk
3/4-1 cup add ins (dried fruit, nuts, chocolate chips, etc)
Mix together flour, sugar, cream of tartar, baking soda and salt in a bowl. Combine butter and flour mixture and blend by hand or with a mixer until mixture has a course crumbly texture. Mix in milk until mixture becomes doughy and holds together. Mix in the add ins. Just divide dough into even mounds onto a baking sheet and bake at 400 degrees F until tops start to turn light brown.
The instructions say to pat the dough out and cut it into smaller triangles, but I don't follow these directions because the dough is too sticky and it's too much of a project. I use my large cookie scoop and scoop out the dough onto a baking sheet. My scones look more like scoops of ice cream than actual triangular scones. However they taste yummy so I can justify taking the easy way out.
Friday, May 02, 2003
Free Shipping and Hamburgers
At work, we used to have this archaic phone system where we (the analyst pool) would answer the main phone after 5pm when our receptionist left. There was this loud night bell that would blare into the office signaling a phone call coming in on the main line. The analysts would put on our professional phone voices and take turns answering the phone each night.
I was working late one night when I answered the phone. I politely asked who was calling and how could I help them. They wanted to talk to my boss Greg, but unfortunately they were on a crackling speaker phone all I could hear was they were "Free Shipping and Hamburgers." Embarrassed that I had heard incorrectly, I asked again who was calling and once again I heard, "Free Shipping and Hamburgers." I didn't want to ask a third time nor did I want to verbally confirm whether they were "Free Shipping and Hamburgers" so I transferred over to Greg and sheepishly had to tell him that "Free Shipping and Hamburgers" was on the phone for him. Naturally he was exasperated since he didn't know a "Free Shipping and Hamburgers," but he agreed to take the call.
Turns out it was three guys on the phone and they were saying all three of their last names in quick succession and they somehow forgot to enunciate into the crackling speaker phone. Their names were something like Friedberg, Shipman and Baumburger. Now that we have direct dial and an technologically advanced voice mail system, I no longer experience mild panic attacks associated with answer the night bell phone.
At work, we used to have this archaic phone system where we (the analyst pool) would answer the main phone after 5pm when our receptionist left. There was this loud night bell that would blare into the office signaling a phone call coming in on the main line. The analysts would put on our professional phone voices and take turns answering the phone each night.
I was working late one night when I answered the phone. I politely asked who was calling and how could I help them. They wanted to talk to my boss Greg, but unfortunately they were on a crackling speaker phone all I could hear was they were "Free Shipping and Hamburgers." Embarrassed that I had heard incorrectly, I asked again who was calling and once again I heard, "Free Shipping and Hamburgers." I didn't want to ask a third time nor did I want to verbally confirm whether they were "Free Shipping and Hamburgers" so I transferred over to Greg and sheepishly had to tell him that "Free Shipping and Hamburgers" was on the phone for him. Naturally he was exasperated since he didn't know a "Free Shipping and Hamburgers," but he agreed to take the call.
Turns out it was three guys on the phone and they were saying all three of their last names in quick succession and they somehow forgot to enunciate into the crackling speaker phone. Their names were something like Friedberg, Shipman and Baumburger. Now that we have direct dial and an technologically advanced voice mail system, I no longer experience mild panic attacks associated with answer the night bell phone.
pollen.com
Over the last week I've become familiar with a newfangled phenomenon, "pollen forecasts." I've never had to think about seasonal allergies, but I've really been suffering this year. I finally snapped out of denying I had allergies and started taking Claritin this morning. Now that I've discovered pollen.com the authority on pollen forecasts, I can now check up on the pollen situation in addition to the weather. I especially like checking up on Los Angeles (a.k.a. home home) to see how nice the weather is there and now I can check the pollen count there as well. I kind of wish they had hourly pollen forecasts, but that might be too much.
Over the last week I've become familiar with a newfangled phenomenon, "pollen forecasts." I've never had to think about seasonal allergies, but I've really been suffering this year. I finally snapped out of denying I had allergies and started taking Claritin this morning. Now that I've discovered pollen.com the authority on pollen forecasts, I can now check up on the pollen situation in addition to the weather. I especially like checking up on Los Angeles (a.k.a. home home) to see how nice the weather is there and now I can check the pollen count there as well. I kind of wish they had hourly pollen forecasts, but that might be too much.
Thursday, May 01, 2003
Tiki Lamps
I find baking to be more fulfilling than cooking real food because desserts require less work and produce more servings. Desserts are a nonessential food item. I suppose they're the nonessential government workers that get to stay home when there's a snowstorm or when our power grid runs out of power and they send everyone home before they start on the rolling brownouts. Trust me, brownouts are a bad thing. Imagine the Cape Cod Chip factory in a rolling brownout...all of a sudden a freshly fried crisp chip flying through the air on a projectile to land in a bag misses the bag and falls on the ground because the electricity turned off. [Tragic] Dinner is like the doctors who stay in the emergency room or firefighters. It doesn't really matter if you don't have dessert; it's just kind of nice to eat dessert. Desserts are kind of like movie stars and celebrities. They're not substantive, but they're pleasing to the palate.
Back to my point about tiki lamps, baking is inexpensive and for the items that cost more than a pittance, I'm always on the lookout for deals and I always stock up. I once stashed away ten pounds of Land O' Lakes Butter when the price dipped below $2. I've since stopped doing that because I don't think my roommates appreciated the month when butter filled a significant portion of our fridge. Trader Joe's is great for stocking up on baking supplies. I've switched from Ghirardelli chocolate chips to Trader Joe's chocolate chips and I try to buy my butter there because quality and price are inversely related, high in quality and low in price.
Finally, let's talk about the tiki lamps. Ironically Trader Joe's were a dime a dozen where I grew up. They were everywhere, but I never really shopped at Trader Joe's until I moved to New England. I had this childhood misconception that Trader Joe's only sold tiki lamps and Hawaiian shirts. I suppose it's part of their theme, but I never knew they were a food store and I was convinced they sold weird South Seas tourist imports such as grass skirts and I wanted to have nothing to do with it. Now that I've mended my childish ways, I love Trader Joe's.
I find baking to be more fulfilling than cooking real food because desserts require less work and produce more servings. Desserts are a nonessential food item. I suppose they're the nonessential government workers that get to stay home when there's a snowstorm or when our power grid runs out of power and they send everyone home before they start on the rolling brownouts. Trust me, brownouts are a bad thing. Imagine the Cape Cod Chip factory in a rolling brownout...all of a sudden a freshly fried crisp chip flying through the air on a projectile to land in a bag misses the bag and falls on the ground because the electricity turned off. [Tragic] Dinner is like the doctors who stay in the emergency room or firefighters. It doesn't really matter if you don't have dessert; it's just kind of nice to eat dessert. Desserts are kind of like movie stars and celebrities. They're not substantive, but they're pleasing to the palate.
Back to my point about tiki lamps, baking is inexpensive and for the items that cost more than a pittance, I'm always on the lookout for deals and I always stock up. I once stashed away ten pounds of Land O' Lakes Butter when the price dipped below $2. I've since stopped doing that because I don't think my roommates appreciated the month when butter filled a significant portion of our fridge. Trader Joe's is great for stocking up on baking supplies. I've switched from Ghirardelli chocolate chips to Trader Joe's chocolate chips and I try to buy my butter there because quality and price are inversely related, high in quality and low in price.
Finally, let's talk about the tiki lamps. Ironically Trader Joe's were a dime a dozen where I grew up. They were everywhere, but I never really shopped at Trader Joe's until I moved to New England. I had this childhood misconception that Trader Joe's only sold tiki lamps and Hawaiian shirts. I suppose it's part of their theme, but I never knew they were a food store and I was convinced they sold weird South Seas tourist imports such as grass skirts and I wanted to have nothing to do with it. Now that I've mended my childish ways, I love Trader Joe's.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)